Day 194: Game of Thrones and my Relationship with Power

Image ©HBO
So I was watching Game of Thrones, and I noticed a peculiar experience come up within me in relation to seeing the characters which display 'the most power' and 'the most ability to subjugate others' - which is an experience of 'awe' and 'respect' -- where, if I imagine being in the presence of someone with so much power that no one can 'threaten them' -- what comes up is an 'awe' and 'respect', and wanting their acceptance

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define a show of power and an ability of someone to harm and kill others, as a value worthy of a feeling of respect and awe, and to believe it is 'natural' to exist within respect and awe of power, instead of realizing that this respect and awe is the product of FEAR - fear to lose my own life, and thus the respect and awe is what I accepted and allowed myself to become as a character / personality to protect my own survival -- not realizing that if I had equal / more power -- I would actually seek to destroy or enslave the one that threatened to destroy / enslave me -- thus I only respect and am in awe of the power to harm / destroy / kill -- because I would like the same power for myself to protect my own survival -- which actually would make me evil

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to admire shows of power and strength and ability to kill, harm, and destroy other beings, instead of realizing that I am admiring it only because in my beingness, the truth of who I am - I am making the statement that I would also kill, destroy, harm, and enslave others to protect my own survival

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define shows of power and strength and ability to kill / harm / enslave / destroy others as 'impressive', instead of realizing this is another indicator that the truth of me is that I would also harm others to protect my own survival

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear to those with the power / ability to harm and kill and destroy, within fearing to lose my own life, and to in this fear, design ways of being accepted / respected by those with power, and to accept whatever those with power do in the name of their power / self interest, so that I can protect my own survival

Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value / protect my own survival more than what is best for all and finding a solution that is best for all

Within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I do not need to exist within fear of my own survival even when there exists someone with the power to destroy / harm / enslave me -- and that even within a relationship where currently I do not yet have the immediate power to change the situation -- I still have the responsibility to commit myself to finding a solution, to doing whatever it takes to come to a solution that is best for all -- because, in fact that is what I would want for myself -- and to accept and allow fear for my own survival and to within the fear accept and allow another to have the power to harm another -- I am accepting and allowing the harm, and am thus equal in my starting point of self interest and harm, as the one with the power

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to admire / respect / stand in awe of acts of 'bravery' where one / a few stand and fight / kill / harm / destroy others to protect their own survival, and to believe that the only way to have peace is to kill those who threaten my own survival -- instead of realizing that an actual act of Bravery would be to change myself from considering only my own survival, to valuing all life equally and coming to a solution / way of life that supports everyone equally, in realizing that if the majority had such a solution available - we would support it and would thus be able to stand up in a practical way that is actually worthy of respect

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear and anger to those who bullied me / defined me as less than them when I was young, because I believed that the only way for humans to exist with each other is within a relationship of 'master / slave' and 'powerful / weak', and that thus the solution to being bullied / threatened is to find a way to get more power than the bully, to be able to bully / threaten them to protect my own survival

Within this, I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that we've accepted money as a form of 'power' to protect ourselves / isolate ourselves from others, and that within this we've accepted and allowed ourselves to exist within and as a relationship of fear toward each other, and that this is because we've accepted and allowed ourselves to value our individual / own survival rather than valuing all life and coming to a solution that is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that using money to build a protected bubble in which I can focus on only the things that I like, and making myself feel 'happy and safe', is 'positive', and 'good' -- instead of realizing that this is based on Fear of others Harming me, and exist within the Acceptance that humanity must exist within Inequality of Power, thus believing that it is okay / acceptable to focus only on protecting my own survival, rather than looking for a solution to support everyone equally so that we don't have to fear each other -- and that thus using money to dedicate my life to protecting myself and focusing only on my own happiness is in fact Negative and supportive of Abuse and Inequality and Masters and Slaves to continue existing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to admire the rich and respect the rich, instead of realizing that I only admire and respect the rich because they represent the power to protect my own self interest / survival -- which in this world is Money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when watching movies and tv shows, to accept the relationship of power / weakness / inequality to exist within myself and thus within existence, so that I can experience / be entertained by an energy experience of 'awe' and 'excitement' in watching displays of power

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire power over others to protect my own survival and self interest, instead of committing myself to a solution that is best for all that would empower everyone equally so that we could have a world without fear

I commit myself to show that power in this world currently only exists within and as FEAR for one's own survival

I commit myself to show that the only reason the feeling / experience of 'victory' and 'vengeance', and 'triumph', and 'winning', and 'domination' exists within human beings / within this world / within history is because from the beginning -- we've always existed in self interest  / competition for survival - and that thus our relationships with each other through family, communities, countries, religions, etc have been built on Fear of each other and the desire to control / dominate others to protect our own survival -- and that, to thus accept and participate in such experiences within watching movies, TV shows, playing games, playing sports -- we are accepting and allowing this same starting point, and if we are to change this world to a place without fear -- we have to actually start taking Self Responsibility for our experiences within ourselves, and to stop valuing / defining ourselves within thoughts, feelings, emotions, memories, stories, characters, relationships that are not based on the valuing of all life Equally as what is best for all

I commit myself to show that using money to protect myself from / ignore what is going on in the world, is an act of abusing power to protect my own survival, which is based on Fear

I commit myself to show that - real power is the power to forgive ourselves and value life equally - as when we all do this - then we would act in ways that benefit all life and we would have a world without fear and we can stop repeating a History of Violence


Related articles
Enhanced by Zemanta

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Communication Hack: Putting a Guard in Front of Your Mouth

Desteni Life Hack: Why do we react to problems?

Day 352: Living Equality in Daily Life - Part 3