Day 65: Physical Tiredness Vs. Mind Tiredness

 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I am not being engaged with moving pictures, sounds, and 'things happening', and am just sitting doing a repetitive task like clicking the mouse button to rate a blog, that I will and must get 'tired' and 'groggy', and 'sleepy', instead of realizing that this tiredness experience is the mind of characters as energy which require constant stimulation to keep the characters activated through constantly triggering memories which activate the thoughts, backchat, feelings and emotions that constitute the characters -- and that in experiencing tiredness and grogginess and heaviness in my head particularly at the end of the day when I am just sitting fairly still and reading, or rating blogs, indicates that throughout my day I had been in my mind as characters as energy experiences -- even of neutral energy experiences of just 'experiencing me' as 'only me' where I was seeing myself in relationship with / toward what is here, toward the physical environment I was in, seeing it separate from me as I was moving through my day, constantly remembering that 'I am me' as 'this only me that is separate from what is here', constantly creating memories of 'what I was just doing', and warping these memories into projections of 'what I am about to do', where the whole time I am moving through my day as an energetic experience of 'me moving through time' through projecting the past as memories into the future -- and wherein, now at the end of the day when 'not much is going on', and I am just sitting still, I am not 'occupied' with anything -- there is nothing to constantly create memories about and project them into the future - there is no stimulation - and so my 'energy drops', and I go into a 'low energy experience' and my mind starts to shut down saying 'okay, it's time to sleep, the day is done, there is no more stimulation to be had, no more energy to generate, time to rest and get ready for another day of stimulation tomorrow'

Within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to, when and as this tiredness / grogginess / sleepiness / heaviness 'takes over', Stop - and actually bring myself here in awareness of my physical body and look to see if my physical body is in fact 'tired' and requiring rest

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that, when I see / physical feel that my physical body is not in fact 'tired' -- that indicates that the 'tiredness' experience that has invaded my head area - is an illusion - is just the mind as energy that I had been participating in during my day and which now dropped into a low energy experience because of a lack of stimulation to activate characters through triggering memories

Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that, I can actually stop this tiredness / sleepiness / heaviness experience through simply breathing myself back Here into and as my physical body, and deciding to just be here with the physical, here as the physical within which - I as my physical body am not tired. I can breathe the tiredness / sleepiness / heaviness energy out as I breathe myself as awareness back into my physical body, becoming aware of each limb, each part of my body as I sit here, feeling my hands, feeling my fingers, feeling my feet and toes, feeling my head, my neck, my back, my stomach, my chest, feeling the touch of the clothing on my skin, feeling the weight of my body resting in the chair - becoming aware of the physical objects on the desk, the computer, the screen, the mouse in my hand, touching the desk - bringing myself back here completely with what is here physically - and then simply moving myself as the physical - as physical awareness, silent, relaxed, stable, constant, Here, in continuing whatever point I was busy with when I 'became tired / sleepy / groggy'.

I commit myself to, when and as an energetic experience of sleepiness, grogginess, tiredness, heaviness all of a sudden 'invades my head area' and starts 'taking over' and I feel like - I can't continue, I must sleep -- to Stop for a moment, and breathe the energy out of my 'head area', releasing it back into the Earth, as I breathe myself back into my body as physical Awareness, physically giving myself back to myself as I release myself from the apparent 'hold' of the energy that started to 'take over' - in realizing that, the energy cannot 'take over' unless I allow it to, through leaving physical awareness Here, and going into the energy and participating in it

Within this I commit myself to, as I bring myself back to physical awareness here with and as and in my physical body, and here with the physical environment I am in, simply look to see of my physical body is in fact tired - which I will experience as my actual physical muscles being fatigued / tired

I commit myself to show how the sleepiness / grogginess / tiredness / heaviness that invades the head area, is not real tiredness - it is just the Mind as Energy as Characters saying 'I as these characters is not being stimulated sufficiently, therefore I am shutting down until you sleep or go find some point of stimulation so that I can generate more energy for my existence / survival'

I commit myself to show how real tiredness is the physical body's muscles being tired, which will in most cases be the result of actual physical work / effort that was done during the day

I commit myself to show that I as the physical body require only 4 to 6 hours of sleep, and that it is the Mind as Characters of and as Energy that requires long stretches of sleep and will randomly get 'tired' when stimulation is removed

I commit myself to show that it is possible to breathe the illusory tiredness of the mind out as I breathe myself back Here to Physical Awareness, and that within this I have the ability to get lots more done in the time I have during my day / evening

I commit myself to, when and as I wake up in the morning, Breathe myself here as Physical Awareness, with and as my physical body, and as Breath, begin moving myself as my physical body in walking my day, making sure to, as I walk my day and thoughts / memories pop into my mind - immediately Stop and delete the thoughts / memories and breathe myself always back here as Physical Awareness

I commit myself to show that when we all breathe ourselves Here as physical awareness, we see that we are all here together in and as the physical, and in this can see clearly what is best for all, and can move ourselves as the physical in taking the actions required / responsibility required to be taken in sorting out this world together to be a place that supports us all as equals in and as the physical

I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing fake tiredness as the mind

I commit myself to decide to be here in every moment as my physical body as the Real character that does not require stimulation in order to exist

I commit myself to show that in creating ourselves into and as characters that exist as energy experiences requiring stimulation, we have fucked up the world, as we have created ourselves into and as a constant struggle to survive / maintain ourselves as energy experiences in self interest to the point where we will ignore poverty and starvation and all forms of abuse that exist daily in this world, simply because the prospect of taking responsibility to move ourselves to work together to sort out this world 'isn't stimulating'

I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing myself and humanity to be slaves to stimulation in self interest, within this accepting and allowing life / the physical to be enslaved into the world system / money system for the purpose of creating stimulation for mind characters of energy

Read Jack's Self Forgiveness on Sleeping
http://desteni.org/a/jack-self-forgiveness-sleeping


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