Day 59: Transforming from Characters into Life

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that thoughts are the pictures and memories with experiences connected to them that exist as my self interest

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that these thoughts are what instantly project into my conscious mind screen as I am physically walking my day, within physical scenarios which contain trigger points for the thoughts to come up

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the conversations, justifications, inner dialogues, voices that I experience in my head are the backchat that is activated AFTER I have already accepted without question the thought as picture / memory with experience connected to it which was triggered by something within the physical scenario I am in

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the experience in / as the thought that is triggered, is always my self interest - as it is my self interest to have an experience that I want / like / desire instead of living physically here one and equal with the physical in a way that considers how to give all equally the best experience as a living reality

Within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the backchat that is activated after I have accepted the thought as picture / memory with experience connected to it, is the justifications, excuses, reasoning as to why and how I should have the experience in the thought rather than live here as a breath in and as the decision to do what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that in firstly accepting the Thought that is triggered, and then in accepting the Backchat that is triggered, the next point that is activated is the Reactions to / toward what is here as the physical in the moment that place me in a point of friction / negativity / conflict with / toward what is here as the physical, and that then when I accept these Reactions as friction / negativity / conflict the next point that is triggered is the Physical Behavior patterns of Self Manipulation aligned with how I can place myself in a position where I am having the experience I want to have - the experience that is connected to the thought that was triggered within the initial particular physical scenario, which I instantly accepted without question -- and that then when I have Accepted the Reactions and Physical Behavior Patterning that is triggered by the Reactions, and allowed myself to be directed / moved by the Reactions / Physical Behavior Pattern and find myself now in the Positive point having the experience that was connected to the initial Thought that was triggered by the physical scenario - then what do I know? I have Accepted and Allowed a Character of and as Self Interest to Direct me / Possess me -- and I was not here as Life, Moving myself in every moment of Breath as the Real Character as my Physical Body within Self Directive Decisions aligned with what is Best for All

And, look again - what came first, before I was able to have the Positive experience of and as my Self Interest? The Negative point as the Reaction / Friction to / toward what was here physically -- where, if I was just living Physically as a Breath, as Life, One and Equal with what is Here - actually Moving Myself as the Real Character which is my Physical Body -- I would not be able to have a positive experience -- because in order to have the positive experience I have to first react to / toward what is here, from and as a point of friction / negativity with / toward what is Here - and to do that I would have to first separate myself from what is here as our Physical Equality and Oneness, into a point of Self Interest of 'only me and my experience'. Read Heaven's Journey to Life for a detailed walkthrough of how this actually works.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when and as a thought as picture / memory with experience connected to it, arises in my mind as a projection onto the screen of my conscious mind where all of a sudden the darkness within me is filled with lights and colors and feelings - accept the thought without question simply because it is attached to a feeling that feels good, within this allowing the backchat, reactions, and physical behavior patterns to be triggered

Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the experience of thinking, because it feels good and therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to feeling good

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the backchat / inner conversations that arise in my mind is 'me thinking', instead of realizing that backchat is the voice of the character that is the experience I have defined myself as - that always seek to have the experience at all costs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in / accept the reactions and physical behavior patterns that are activated after I have accepted the thought and backchat, simply because I cared more about having and experience as my self interest as 'feeling good' in some way, than about what is Best for All Life -- where, if I cared about Life I would Live as Life, Moving myself in every moment of breath in Physical Living to produce what is best for all within the context of what I can actually do in every moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard what I Self Honestly see I can do in the moment, because I allowed myself to value an experience of feeling good in some way, rather than valuing Life

I commit myself to, when and as a thought arise in my mind as pictures, lights, colors, projected onto the screen of my conscious mind from the darkness, and when and as an experience as feeling arise with the thought, STOP myself immediately from participating in the thought and feeling, in realizing that a Character that I have created is in the process of being activated and possessing my physical body, and I delete the thought and Physically move myself within and as the task at hand in Deciding in the moment to do what is best for all, and then immediately living my decision

I commit myself to, when and as backchat arise in my mind - to immediately STOP and realize I have already accepted a THOUGHT and thus Allowed the backchat to activate, and that a Character I created is in the process of activating and possessing my Physical Body -- and to identify what the thought was, and delete it and physically move myself within and as the task at hand according to what is best for all within Deciding in the moment to do what is best for all, and then immediately living my decision

I commit myself to, when and as a reaction arise within me - to immediately STOP and realize I have already accepted a THOUGHT / Experience and thus allowed and already accepted the BACKCHAT as justifications / inner voice, as a character I have created that is in the process of activating and possessing my physical body, and I delete the thought / experience, and physically move myself within and as the task at hand according to what is best for all within Deciding in the moment to do what is best for all, and then immediately living my decision

I commit myself to, when and as I see I have gone into a physical behavior pattern where I am moving automatically and was not Here moving myself One and Equal with the Physical in Living the Decision to do what is best for all, I STOP and realize I have already accepted and allowed a Thought, Backchat, and Reaction to / toward the Physical as a point of Friction / Negative experience, and thus have Allowed the Physical Behavior Pattern to be activated as part of a character I have created that is in the process of activating and possessing my physical body, and I Identify the thought / experience that was initially triggered, delete the thought, and breathe and move myself physically one and equal as my body - within Deciding in the moment to do what is best for all, and then immediately living my decision - moving myself in placing myself within the relevant task I see is best for all -- and if I fall in the moment and cannot stop myself from being directed by the Reaction and Physical Behavior Pattern, I realize the point of the Thought / Experience as the Character of Self Interest I have created, requires more extensive writing and investigation and self forgiveness and self corrective statements - and I thus do not judge myself or try to fight the Character I created, but I move myself as my Physical Body in taking self responsibility to do the writing / investigation / self forgiveness / self corrective statements

I commit myself to walk / apply / repeat this application until I have deleted ALL characters of and as self interest and am Here in every moment as Life in fact - birthed through my actual Physically Lived Change

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