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Showing posts from June, 2012

Day 44: Deconstructing my Astral Projection Experience

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Thus far I've walked through my experiences with seeing a UFO, experiencing myself having a 'spiritual awakening', aligning my lifestyle with a 'zen environment', and 'communicating' with 'motherships' in meditation / prayer. At this stage I was quite solidified in my perception that there existed a 'non physical' reality, which within my mind I saw as something resembling how one experiences oneself in a dream, where everything is somewhat unstable and easily moldable and able to be manipulated to suit what one wants to experience.
Here I'm having a look at my experience with Astral Projection, or rather my experience with being frustrated that I was not able to 'astral project'.
Within the course of my study of spiritual websites, I learned about the practice of Astral Projection, wherein one usually would lie down and relax one's whole body gradually, and in breathing and going deeper and deeper into the relaxation state, one…

Day 43: Deconstructing my Mothership Contact Experience

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So here I'm continuing the walking of all my 'spiritual experiences'. Thus far I've walked through my experience of seeing a blue light / ufo leading up to my 'spiritual awakening' experience, along with my experience with 'zen / spiritual' environments that I used to solidify my idea of myself as an 'ascending being' here on a 'spiritual mission' to help 'raise the vibration' of humanity through 'raising my own vibration'.
Here I'm having a look at another 'UFO' experience.
Now, I'm sure everyone has noticed that when the sun goes down and the stars start to come out, you'll see, usually near the horizon, certain stars that seem to 'twinkle', and 'sparkle', with a multi-colored effect, whereas most of the other stars in the sky will be just white. Also if you look long enough you'll see stars shoot across the sky, and sometimes they will look blue, or pink, or other colors.
I always w…

Day 42: Transcending Anger with Physical Breathing

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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow myself to exist in relationship to what is here as the physical through and as an emotional / energetic experience of anger
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define who I am as an emotional energetic experience of anger, instead of realizing that who I am is the physical - and the physical has no emotion, and does not get angry
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a relationship of and as an emotional energy experience of anger toward the physical
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within positive / negative / neutral experiences toward the physical, within this accepting and allowing myself to exist in relationship to / towards the physical, instead of being here, breathing, as the physical, with and as all as one as equal
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself when I allowed an experience o…

Day 41: Deconstructing my Zen Lifestyle Part 2

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I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that, the reason I experienced the clutter, disorganized shelves and closets, and piles of clothes in my room as being of a 'lower vibration' that was 'making me feel frustrated and depressed', was because I had accepted and allowed myself to participate within the polarity design of positive / negative value judgments placed in physical forms, objects, colors, arrangements according to what was defined and described in spiritual / new age material as that which represented / was associated with a 'lower, limited, physical vibration', and that which represented / was associated with a 'higher, freer, energetic / spiritual' vibration
Thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and see that, I was actually blaming the physical objects as being the 'source' of my experience of limitation, frustration, depression, constriction as what …

Day 40: Deconstructing my Zen Lifestyle Part 1

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In my previous post I described how, in my experience of 'spiritual awakening', I started to see the world, see existence, and see myself in relation to the world and existence, in terms of there being a 'higher reality' which is heaven / non physical dimensions / realities, and a 'lower reality', which is the physical world / earth. In spirituality / ascension material this is also described as 'low density', and 'high density'. Within this, Earth, as the 'lower' reality of physicality, is the place where beings are still 'learning' to remember that who they really are is actually of god / creator / source, which is a 'higher vibration' experienced as light, love, bliss, joy, happiness, freedom, instant manifestation of desires - while the Earth / physicality as the 'lower vibration' is experienced as conflict, limitation, struggle, confusion.
Within this 'existential scheme of things', I saw myself as an …

Day 39: Deconstructing my Spiritual Awakening

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Many may wonder what exactly a 'spiritual awakening' is. Well, lucky for you I have first hand experience.  My 'awakening' had its beginnings in my earlier years in school, where I developed emotional patterns of anger, frustration, depression, confusion, as reactions to situations I had difficulty understanding - bullies, rules, restrictions, not fitting in with social groups. And later as I experienced a struggle to earn money to do the things I wanted to do and couldn't understand why I found it so hard to live in this world while it seemed so easy for everyone else.

About a year after high school ended, was when I saw the blue light / UFO outside my house - my first UFO experience. And, as I explained in my previous post about my UFO experience, this event I experienced as validation of my idea about myself that I was 'from another world', and 'destined to experience myself being free from this world', which were ideas I formed as a way to try a…