Day 17: Satisfaction of Success in Money and Sex


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a world where satisfaction is defined by a feeling of security when one has achieved success in earning money and getting a relationship so one can buy things and have sex and exist in comfort without having to worry about one's survival - within this ignoring the plight of millions of other beings who have no chance at achieving / living this definition of satisfaction

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that satisfaction would be when I have effectively established for myself a daily direction in living that is working toward the creation of / giving of a world that is best for all, to all - where we all give life to each other, so that we can all live as life -- wherein all our needs are satisfied, thus eliminating fear, competition, greed, crime, conflict, so that we can then each focus on developing our self expression, growth, and expansion as Life to a point where we are satisfied we are each living to our fullest as life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel satisfied when someone indicates to me that they see me as attractive / worthy of being in a relationship / having sex with, instead of realizing that this feeling of satisfaction is an energetic reward that has been conditioned through having allowed myself to be programmed by movies, television, magazines, society to define myself as worthless / valueless without confirmation from others that I am desirable / worthy of being in a relationship / having sex with

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel satisfied when I earn my paycheck, instead of realizing that this feeling of satisfaction is an energetic reward that has been conditioned through me having accepted 'fear for my survival' as the motivator / starting point of my participation in the system, wherein when I receive my paycheck I am being rewarded for my efforts with money to survive

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the only satisfactory way for those with money in this world to use their money, would be to fund the development and implementation of a new world system based on giving to each other what we all need for a dignified and effective life, so that we do not have to be motivated by fear for survival and so that we can bring an end to the abuse of survival by the few to control the many through fear to make a profit through enslaving the many to a system of fear and reward

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when I have money and sex, feel satisfied with myself and my life, even though I am aware that there are millions in this world without even basic necessities fulfilled such as clean water, food, clothing, health care, education, electricity - within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel satisfied with myself in SPITE of the suffering of others - but to cover up this spite with the justification that 'I can't do anything to help them'

Within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the self that is satisfied in spite of the ongoing suffering of millions of beings, cannot be life - because Life would not accept the suffering of itself in form as those without money -- and therefore currently my 'self' is a program of self interest as feelings and emotions conditioned through fear and reward within the current money system

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be brainwashed by capitalism to accept a definition of self that does not include the consideration of what is best for all life, but only includes me as an individual and what is best for me - which is a self that exists as abuse, because even as I am given life by the earth, I am abusing what has been given to me by ignoring those who are denied the life giving support of the earth in the name of capitalism and profit

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that sex and relationships should not be a reward as an energetic stimulant to experience happiness / self satisfaction to contrast a world of fear and suffering around me, but that sex and relationships should be the tool through which I honor the life that was given to me by the earth by bringing into this world a being that will be satisfactory in its ability to become a responsible earthling that cares for life contributes to what is best for all to the fullest of its expression

I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing myself to feel satisfied even as I am aware that the conditions for most in this world can IN NO WAY WHATSOEVER be called satisfactory

I commit myself to stop abusing the life that was given to me through my acceptance of an abusive world system and a neglectful definition of life as the pursuit of happiness as reward for efforts motivated by fear

I commit myself to stopping my patterns of feelings of self satisfaction when and as I get money, and to stop seeing money as a reward, but to realize that money should be equal for all and that fear should not exist as a motivator for anyone, and thus I dedicate myself to investigating how I can use my money to firstly fulfill my survival needs but then to direct my funds in whatever way I can, to the development and implementation of an equal system that supports life based on the principle of everyone giving to each other what we would like to receive, where then all are equally rewarded

I commit myself to stopping my patterns of self satisfaction when and as I am having sex or when and as someone indicates to me that I am worthy of being in a relationship / having sex with, and stopping myself from seeing sex and relationships as a reward based on feelings of happiness and security that only exist as an escape from facing what exists in this world, and I commit myself to stop abusing sex and relationships for self interest, and dedicate myself to changing my starting point within relationships and sex from that of feelings and reward as self interest, to that of establishing a practical agreement between two people to support each other to become self honest, responsible beings that do not accept or allow each other to accept a world / self of abuse and self interest and neglect, and support each other to become the most effective they can be in developing a life based on contributing to what is best for all, so that when we bring a child into this world we will not brainwash our child with self interest and neglect of life, but will support our child to learn effectively to be able to understand how the world works and and what is going on in the world and to see that allowing other beings to suffer is not acceptable

I commit myself to, in every moment of breath ask myself if I am applying myself satisfactorily in aligning my decisions about who I am and the direction I will take in my life, with supporting humanity to realize that self interest and an abusive money system is not acceptable and not satisfactory

I commit myself to assisting and supporting myself to become a being that can stand before all life and be satisfied that I have done all I can to stop abuse and bring about a world that is best for all

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